TERMITES IN THE FAMILY
Termites are very destructive. They devour whatever they can find. An army of termites can reduce a piece of furniture to rubbles.
There are spiritual termites that are sponsored by the devil to destroy the essence and the fabric of the family. As long as there are termites in the family, the possibility of achieving wholesomeness will become impossible. You must therefore, locate every destructive termite in your family and destroy them in order to save your home.
So far, we have established the fact that God has established a good marital foundation. In this chapter we shall identify the type of termite which the enemy has released in this end time in order to destroy the family.
DESTRUCTION OF GOOD MARITAL FOUNDATION
Let us now examine factors responsible for the destruction of a good marital foundation.
They are:
Immaturity before marriage
Many are pushing themselves into trouble when they get married at a young age. For a girl of seventeen, who is in secondary school and still under the care of her parents, to decide to get married at that tender age is an act of immaturity.
Selfishness and divergent interest on both sides of husband and wife Lack of companionship and mutual affection
Vanity or display of pride
Disappointment of expectations in the area of sex
Lack of responsibility on the part of the husband or wife
Exposing family problems to a third party without the consent of one another
It is only the immature spouse that needs a third party to settle their cases. Mature couples would always keep their arguments and disagreements at private levels.
There was a man of God who used to ask from any man and woman who come to him to inform him of their marital intentions whether they have had a quarrel. If they said; “Man of God, we love each other, we have never quarrelled.” He would then ask them to go away and have a quarrel. The idea is that if they should fight and settle the squabble, then, when they eventually get married they would know how to settle quarrels and manage crisis.
The day of a tragedy for a marriage is any day parents come to settle disagreements between husband and wife. Family disagreements and differences are supposed to be settled through prayer and dialogue.
I agree that there may be few cases in which a man of God would be invited for counselling and prayers. But if you discover that in the family you always have disagreements that only third parties resolve, then there is trouble.
You must know what you are doing. Throw the third party away and settle your differences with prayer, dialogue and maturity. The key is, it is better that the third party does not know the secrets between the husband and his wife.
Over sensitivity to matters
Inferiority and superiority complexes
Lack of trust on either side
Unfair scathing, sarcastic and incriminatory remarks
A woman came to me to report being physically abused by her husband. I followed the wife home so that he might stop beating her. As we moved closer towards the direction of their home. The wife said; “Pastor, look at him coming – crawling like a snake.” Immediately she said that, I stood still. The wife said, “Are you not following me again?” I told her; “If you would say that your husband crawls like a snake in my presence, then only God knows what you said before he started to beat you up.”
It is a matter of fact that, the woman who never talks will never get beaten up. Before the man started beating his wife up thoroughly, it means the woman had made some provocative statements or comments.
Unfaithfulness on the part of the husband or the wife
As a wife, pray for your husband always because some husbands do not like to misbehave. But there are many women on the streets, who are shooting satanic arrows against innocent men.
I know of a situation where a woman entered Into another woman’s house and said; “Madam, I want you to lend me your husband for two weeks.”
The madam in the house was so shocked that she did not know what to say or do next. She said something told her to take a bottle and break it on the head of the strange woman but, another spirit said, you better be careful and be quiet because if someone could be so bold to the extent of coming to another woman’s matrimonial home with such a request, then fighting such a woman with physical weapons would aggravate or escalate the trouble.
To the amazement of the wife, her husband went in packed his clothes, carried his briefcase and followed the woman. Such a situation was a product of satanic manipulation.
Lack of self-control and consideration for the other partner’s feeling over sexual urge Women liberation carried into the home, is another problem.
Paying little attention to appearances is a devilish tool for undermining marital foundations
Saving and withdrawal of family funds without the consent of the other
Abdication of family duties to the parents of the wife or that of the husband
Deceit on the part of either the husband or the wife
Prayerlessness and ungodliness
Suspicion and depreciating love
Lack of leadership qualities on the part of the husband Selfishness
If the wife only cooks when she is hungry, she is selfish. If the husband only buys things for himself, he is selfish. If one party is sick and the other one is less bothered, it is selfishness. Some parties pick up their dresses for washing and leave those that belong to their spouses. All these are characteristic features of selfishness.
Lack of faith and trust in the finished work of Christ Useless, unnecessary over-spending and impulsive buying Hot or quick temper – anger has destroyed so many families Lack of submission from the wife
Family disloyalty
Creation of camps at home
If the father has his own camp and the wife has her own camp, the home will be divided.
Keeping a diary of offenses
Violence
“Had I known” syndrome
Men and women often say, “I have many people I would have married, I do not know why I married you.” This is a termite which destroys the foundation of a good home.
Blame shifting and counter accusation
Giving preferential treatment to some children and neglecting the others
Communication breakdown in the home
The act of transferring the love meant for each other to the children
Inability to speak with a single voice over family issues
When couples are no longer burden-bearers for one another
Taking counsel from wrong people
Nagging
Family interference and unhealthy control
All these are evil termites that eat up the foundation of families. It is important to note that we need the power of God to maintain our homes today. We must take note of the fact that, the family is under serious attack in these last days. Christian homes in particular are under fire.
You need to subject the foundation of your home to thorough deliverance.
PRAYER POINTS
- Every arrow fired against my home, backfire, in the name of Jesus.
- Every power of marriage destruction, my life is not your candidate, die, in the name of Jesus.
- Everything the enemy has stolen from my marriage, I recover them by fire, in the name of Jesus.
- Every marital failure of my father’s house, every marital failure of my mother’s house, my life is not your candidate therefore, scatter, in the
- Glory of God, arise, incubate my home, in the name of Jesus.
- The signs and wonders that have never happened to me before, manifest in my life, in the name of Jesus.
- Thou power of strange children walking against my destiny, scatter, in Jesus name.
- Thou power of great waters working against my destiny, die, in the name of Jesus.
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