GOD’S FOUNDATION FOR FAMILIES | Family Deliverance by Dr. D. K. Olukoya

GOD’S FOUNDATION FOR FAMILIES

Foundations are very vital in every area of life. The strength and height of every structure is predetermined by the foundation. Every pursuit has foundation. The foundation determines how long a structure will last.

Facts about foundation

God has laid a solid foundation for the family. The plan of God for the family has been made clear from the beginning of the world.

Let us examine the following points:

 The Biblical blueprint for marriage is monogamy

One man with one wife is God’s standard. God is against polygamy. If we examine the evil that polygamy has done in the lives of Africans, tears would roll down our cheeks. If a man needs more than one woman, God would have removed more ribs from Adam to form many women for him.

 The husband is the head of the home

It is God’s ordained order as Christ is the head of the Church.

Ephes. 5:17: Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is.

 The wife is a help meet for the man

The wife is not just an ordinary woman. She is not an harlot and she is never a mere sexual object. She is not a concubine and she is never a slave girl. She is not an housemaid. But, she is a help meet for the man

physically, morally and spiritually. This is the real foundation for marriage that God institutionalized.

Reasons for marital turbulence

Today, God’s standard has been eroded. Hence we now have several chaotic situations. It is very unfortunate that many are still following evil patterns these days. Once evil patterns are followed, chaos begins. The adherence to evil patterns have led to several instances of marital turbulence.

If issues concerning the home are carefully sorted out, every other thing will fall in line. The wrong things, which are prevalent in the society are off-shoots of the wrong shape of things in the home.

ORIGINAL DIVINE BLUE PRINT FOR MARRIAGE

What then is the deeper and original divine blue print for marriage?

 The origin or foundation of marriage

Let us examine the beginning of marriage in the Bible.

Genesis 2:24: Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and

shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

The first thing which comes to the fore when one cleaves to one’s partner, examining God’s blue prints for marriage is leaving.

God demands that after a wedding ceremony when the contract of marriage is in force; the man must be separated from his parents and cleave unto his wife. The idea of men tying themselves to the apron strings of their mothers is completely unscriptural. This has destroyed so many homes. Several times, pastors have had causes to sit down and settle quarrels because, the mother-in-law and the woman were at loggerheads.

I know a woman who virtually became a slave to every member of her husband’s family. She did everything humanly possible to satisfy them, as if each of them were her husband. For example, she spent majority of her time cooking for them.

A week after she was delivered of a baby, the family of the husband came from the village again and said they wanted to eat pounded-yam. They instructed this woman, who had just delivered a baby to pound the yam for them! She could not say no to them to avoid any possible trouble that might ensue from their end. Tragedy struck when she was pounding the yam. She slumped and died.

“Therefore, shall a man leave his father and mother.” Are you there and you have not left your father and mother? Are you planning for marriage? Go and secure your own accommodation. separate from where your father and mother lives.

It is not proper that your newly wedded wife starts to compete for the kitchen, the toilet, bathroom and the seats in the house of your parents with others. It is completely unscriptural. This unpleasant development has destroyed so many homes. As a result of this, many will not be delivered from the evil powers of their fathers’ house until they take a step of leaving their parents to cleave to their spouse.

The next point to note is encapsulated in these words: “And shall cleave unto his wife.” Yes, there ought to be ‘cleaving’; that is ‘a joining’, The husband and his wife must stay under the same roof and inside one room. All these American style marriages or British marriages where husbands and wives are widely separated from each other for several years are devilish.

“Where is your husband” a woman was asked. She answered; “We got married in 1995, I am still here in Nigeria and the man is in America. Since he left for America, I have never set my eyes on him again.” That is rubbish and it is not scriptural. You are married today and the next day there is disorganization – this is not God’s plan for marriage.

In marriage there is always a call for sacrifice. There was a case like the one just narrated. The woman was abroad while the husband lived in Nigeria. The wife beckoned on her husband to come over. The husband said he has a good job here so he could not go. The issue became a serious problem. When I intervened, we started praying and the woman decided to come back home (Nigeria). so as to live under the same roof. It took divine intervention before this could happen.

A couple should have no privacy between each other. They should have nothing to hide from each other. There is nothing they should be ashamed of. This blue print is well-laid out in the scripture.

But today, many marriages are in trouble. Wherever a marriage is in trouble. the first place to check is the foundation. If there is a trouble and confusion in your marriage, then check the foundation of your marriage. If the foundation is wrong, the whole essence of marriage is wrong. You might say, “I don’t know why my husband is behaving like this?” Do not blame your spouse.

The first question is how did you get into marital turbulence in the first instance. “I don’t know why my wife is behaving like this?” The first question is this; “Where and how did you find her? And what was the foundation of the relationship?”

When I was doing the second year of my doctorate degree in a university in England, a student came to see me. He said, “Daniel, I want you to follow me to the airport to welcome my wife from Nigeria.” I said, “Will you pay for my transport?” He said “Yes.” So, I followed him. We waited at the airport until the plane from Nigeria arrived. My friend put his hand into his pocket and brought out a photograph. As the travellers passed by, my friend started cross-checking each woman with the photograph in his hand.

I looked at my friend and said, “Do you mean that you don’t know her?” He said “I don’t know her but they posted her to me.” I was so puzzled that I asked, “You have never met her before?” He said, “Not at all.” I was afraid.

We waited for a long period until practically everyone came out of the plane. Suddenly, we saw one light-skinned lady coming. My friend looked

at the picture, surveyed the face of the girl, ran towards her, called her name and they embraced each other. That was the foundation of their own marriage.

A few months later the woman ran away with a German. My friend wanted to commit suicide. I told him “Do not kill yourself.” The foundation of your marriage is the airport. Why do you want to kill yourself? Don’t you remember how you met her.” If my friend had thought of laying a good foundation for his home, he would not have made such a costly mistake.

“If the foundation be destroyed what can the righteous do?” When marriages are contracted while you were an enemy of God, the foundation is wrong. Marriages that originated from accidental pregnancies and not because of sincere or genuine love towards each other is surely built on bad foundations.

If you have started sleeping with your would-be-wife before the proper marriage, you have laid your marital foundation on a sinking sand which would trouble you later on in life.

Marriage after demonic consultation is also established on a wrong foundation. If you have taken the name of your spouse to prayer houses or to fake prophets or fetish priests, then you have built your marriage on a wrong foundation.

When a marriage is based on beauty or handsomeness, then it would not last. When beauty begins to fade, problems will ensue. Marriages that were contracted based on being charmed would collapse. Marriages that were formalized without divine approval are built on wrong foundations. If you have entered into a covenant with a man by cutting yourself and drinking one another’s blood; it is a wrong foundation.

Marriages established on the basis of wealth are built on shaky foundations.

Marriages solemnized by satanic rituals are built on wrong foundations.

Marriages based on trial and error, such as sampling techniques as means of choice of a marriage partner are built on wrong foundations.

Marriages borne out of attractions or based on occult manifestation means are fake marriages.

The marriages that are contracted based on material interests are built on faulty foundations.

If love is based on money then the person would be treated as a commodity.

If the foundation of any marriage is based on a satanic prophecy. “Thus saith the Lord”, whereas God did not say anything, such marriages would be ephemeral.

Marriage established by donation of a girl at a very tender age of ten years to an old man as a wife is a wrong practice.

If you and your spouse were unbelievers before you got married you might be passing through some kinds of problems now, except you know how to pray for the deliverance of your family

All these should be well considered. Marriage is not a light matter. It should not be handled with levity.

When a woman gets married to a man whose sole reason for marriage is procreation or a man who is looking for male children, that woman might become useless immediately such goals are not achieved. If no children are born, the wife might be shown the way out. Some Christians with strange doctrines would open their eyes and walk into the mouth of lions by going to marry unbelievers. Many of them have gone away from the faith through unequal yokes. The unbelieving man would then ban them from praying and ban them from serving God.

When the foundation is bad, it is only God’s power that can repair such a home. Even, Christian homes that are properly established are attacked by

the devil in order to undermine the divine blueprint, not to talk of ungodly homes.

There are powers that destroy the foundation of marriage. First, let it be clear that if someone is looking for a perfect man or woman, then he must extend his search to mortuaries. There are men and women of perfect behaviour there!